Digression, It happens

Today is day 10 of my good habit building endeavor, and my journey to self-improvement. If you read my previous post you know that I wanted to build a habit of starting the day by taking a cold shower. Thus far I have stayed true. However, yesterday something happened that, quite honestly took me by surprise. I woke up feeling great, and did my morning cold shower routine, hopped on my bike and decided to take ride in search for inspiration. Yet, somewhere along the way I decided to have a lazy day. Without realizing it I began to act in my old patterns and I didn’t even know it, or maybe had forgotten where this behavior leads and continued to act on it. It wasn’t till the middle of the day as I laid in my bed ready to take a nap that I realized “What the hell am I doing?” I was a bit taken back because the old routines all came back. I always thought when you digress, you have an overwhelming urge to engage in those old habits. In this situation however it was not the case, because I didn’t even question the behavior, I just acted on it. This makes sense when you remember how strong a habit that has been automated in your brain really is. The brain overrides the decision making process to get you that instant gratification reward it knows you love so much.

This is where the battle began. You would think that realizing this, I would jump out of bed and begin doing the things that I had planned for that day. Again, I was encountered with a different sensation than I thought. My inner dialog began saying the usual BS, and it went something like this:

Lazy me: “You already decided on this, you might as well enjoy the rest of the day”

Achiever me: “Yeah, but I know that it is in this very moments that I’m supposed to be the strongest”

Lazy me: “Exactly! you already know this, don’t get up. Take a nap and later when you wake up eat a bunch of junk food”

Achiever me: “That sounds soooo good right now, but I fear that if I give in now I’ll ruin tomorrow too.”

Lazy me: “Nonsense! remember what we read, sometimes you will fall back, so just chalk it up to one of those moments and enjoy the day”

That’s when it hit me. I realized how for so long I’ve tricked myself into thinking that I can just convince myself that “oh, its only for today”, “I’ll get right to it tomorrow”. This are the lies that you tell yourself so that you can remain the same. Your brain doesn’t like change, because it like conserving energy. In that moment the little voice that over the past nine days had grown stronger said “if you give into it now you will give into it again tomorrow.” I thought back to the past nine days, and how much I’ve been getting done, how great I’ve been feeling and how much of a loser I felt like laying there.

If you have ever found yourself in this situation, remind yourself that these are the little battles you must win. Those moments make the different between nipping it in the bud and staying on course or binging on bad habits again and losing all your progress. Sometimes your old habits will creep up on you. However the moment you realize it, that is the moment when you must gather up all your strength to say no!. That is where you must use the intelligent brain that tricks you into staying in bed to your advantage. Figure out something to do that will get you out of that mental trap. If you realize that you are debating action on old self destructive habits, STOP the debate and do something different. Meaning go to the bathroom, get a drink of water, or just go outside. This battles can get really tough, sometimes your will to stay in bed might be stronger. Specially those days when nothing feel worth doing. Fortunately for me, the past nine days had made me a little stronger. So I got up, took my equipment and went out to find places to shoot my next YouTube video. Once I was out I felt different, I was glad that I didn’t stay in bed. I got a bunch of great shots and came back home feeling like I won. Today, I feel great and I’m not about to let myself make the same mistake again.

I’ll leave you with this: You will falter, and more often than not you won’t realize it till after the fact. Just remember that your decision means a lot for your inner psyche, so even if you don’t decide to get right back on track with the things you had planned for that day, you MUST decide on DOING something that distracts you from the old self-destructive routine, so as to keep them from taking root again.


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